“A Bar in the Waiting Room Would be Lovely”

During our August 2015 Father Survey at MGH’s Vincent Obstetrics out-patient service, the thoughts of one of the fathers drifted to what he would really like: A bar in the waiting room! This will not be among the offerings to the fathers who accompany their wives and partners to pre-natal visits, but he must have been one of the 99% who said they are excited to become fathers. He may even have been one of the 28% of the 401 men surveyed who said they drink alcohol more than 4-6 times a week. Or maybe he is one of the 26% who acknowledged having symptoms of depression. After all, 56% of men agreed that becoming a father is stressful!

We estimate that expecting fathers accompanied their wives or partners to nearly half of all prenatal visits even though 33% of lower income fathers had to take unpaid time from work to be present. Men clearly want to support their growing families by being involved in pre-natal care.

For those who believe fathers are hard to find or are reluctant to speak, we found that 85% of fathers who were asked completed our 45-question survey (conducted on iPad minis). TFP approached these men at a critical time in their lives and they spoke up:

36% would like more information about becoming a father or pregnancy’s impact on men

57% want more information about their contribution to a healthy pregnancy

49% want more information about practical parenting skills

The survey was conducted in the waiting room of the Obstetrics Department and the fathers loved the attention they received! One wife asked what her husband and I were discussing when she joined us in the waiting area, and he replied, “This is just for daddies.” Another man, who had to rush to the delivery room on a Friday with his wife after completing only the first half of the survey, returned on Monday carrying twins in two baby carriers. As he entered the waiting area, his first words were, “Can I complete my survey now?” Yes of course!

Father and his newborn twins at MGH's Vincent Obstetrics after completing The Fatherhood Project's Father Engagement Survey


What did we learn?

Men are excited about becoming fathers. Babies are born to the mother biologically but most often into families socially.

Men are stressed about becoming fathers; those with private insurance are more stressed than fathers with public or no insurance.

Men want assistance, particularly information and skills about how to support their wives and partners (58%) and how to understand their infant’s emotions and needs (54%)

Men are also interested in the impact of pregnancy and parenting on their health and recognize that their current health is important for the health of their infant (96%)

BUT:

36% of the men haven’t had a physical within the past year

AND:

50% of men were overweight and 17% were obese

We plan to administer our survey at other obstetric clinics to hear what men in other communities have to say about themselves in the pre-natal period. We feel grateful to have related to men who are caring and involved, and willing to speak about their wants and needs. The results of our survey raised concerns about Men’s Health. TFP is collaborating with the staff and doctors at Vincent OB to give the men what they need– pertinent health care services and. information to help them be better husbands, partners and fathers. While the process of providing services for men has begun, I am pretty certain the results will not include a bar in the waiting room!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *